Growing Pains


I've found the more I want to change, the harder it is.

I spent three years working in the surfings industry, something at 22, I truly did want for myself. I thought it was dreamy, the clothes, the lifestyle, but I did not know what lurked below the surface. And the more I learned, the worse it got. I was just another part of the rat race.

Now, at 27, my morals, and what I believe in have changed so much from that young woman who had her eyes set on something more superficial. I believe in sustainability. I believe in rest. I believe in travel. I believe in truth. I believe in recovery. I deeply believe in love. I believe in healing.

So I quit my job. Amidst a goddam global pandemic. Because if now isn't a time to change, then what other time would be appropriate to do so? The world is shifting. Many things are changing, and my career path is one of them.

That little voice in the back of my mind is still whispering its doubts. And sometimes I give that little spark too much air, and it expands quickly into a flame.

But I know I have made the right choice for myself. My heart felt heavy sitting in a place it knew it wasn't happy, but it is fluttering now with nervousness of change and potential of who I can be in this world.